Purchasing a Swimsuit?

I haven't purchased a swimsuit in several years. My current fave no longer fits due to my weight loss and the suit I wore before that "fits" but is no longer flattering. We're going to the beach in less than two weeks and this chore cannot be put off any longer.

Mom and I were off to Ross and TJMaxx in search for "the one". I took the camera along to document this in the hopes that some designer will see the agony a regular woman goes through and do something about it. And I wanted to entertain you and myself.

Here is suit #1. It's not horrible but the legs are not cut high enough for someone with large thighs.

Suit #2. This is better with the extra fabric around the middle and the top was more supportive but again the legs are not cut high enough. And it's black. I do not want to bear another smothering summer absorbing extra heat in a black suit. Why do people think that anyone who wears a size 14+ must want to wear black?! It doesn't slim anything, NO ONE IS FOOLED.

Suit #3. I don't think this one requires any explanation. Moving on.

Suit #4. The pattern here is S-T-R-E-T-C-H-E-D in unflattering areas. And who came up with those flimsy strings to keep the top up? Absurd.

Suit #5. The Miracle Suit underperformed. The bust area ended well below my chest. As you can see I'm starting to lose my patience with this.

Suit #6. This skirted two piece get up was just silly. It made me feel like what the English refer to as a "tart".

Suit #7. I really liked this one and I could have overlooked the fact that it was black. I cannot overlook the price tag, $142.00. I'm not kidding.

We left empty handed today.